I'm just stopping by to promote me "food related" book.
See how that works?
Buy it here. Contact me at WBXylo at the gmails for review copies and all that jive. . .
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
All right all right. . .
So I haven't posted anything here for 9 months or so.
I'm just stopping by to promote me "food related" book.
See how that works?
Buy it here. Contact me at WBXylo at the gmails for review copies and all that jive. . .
I'm just stopping by to promote me "food related" book.
See how that works?
Buy it here. Contact me at WBXylo at the gmails for review copies and all that jive. . .
Sunday, July 27, 2014
Week 2's winning vegetable. . .
Based on quantity alone, our second week winner is arugula. We got a metric fuckton of arugula from the dirty hippie collective last Saturday. Seriously. In came in a dry-cleaning bag. We ate arugula everyday for every meal and still had to throw some away.
Lots of arugula, I'm saying.
Arugula, as we learned from "Camp Candy" is like lettuce for rich people.
Arugula, as many know, is like lettuce that tastes like burning. People seem to like it, though.
Here is something to do with it aside from the standard green salad or sandwich topping:
New Red Potato and Arugula Salad:
(Shamelessly ripped off from here)
1. Season water in a large pot and bring it to a boil.
2. While waiting for that to happen, wash and chop 1-2lbs new red potatoes. You want bite sized pieces, slightly smaller than if you were making straight up boiled potatoes.
3. Boil the potatoes for about 15 minutes.
4. Drain those in your colander and let cool.
5. While that is cooling, get some arugula. You want enough volume of arugula to match the amount of potatoes you've cooked. Wash your arugula, dry it, and tear it up. You want big pieces, and you probably don't want to eat the stems. You can eat the stems, but it doesn't look as nice and people have stems hanging out of their mouths, and everybody looks like a hillbilly.
6. Now, in a separate bowl, mix 3 tablespoons of white vinegar with salt, pepper and few cloves worth of minced garlic.
7. Slowly pour 1/4 cup of olive oil into the vinegar mixture while whisking the crap out of it. You want to beat it till it is glossy. You know to do that thing to it. . . When it all homogenizes. . . . My wife knows what I'm talking about. . .
8. Toss the cool potatoes with the dry and torn arugula and the newly made dressing in a big bowl.
9. Serve at room temp.
Lots of arugula, I'm saying.
Arugula, as we learned from "Camp Candy" is like lettuce for rich people.
Arugula, as many know, is like lettuce that tastes like burning. People seem to like it, though.
Here is something to do with it aside from the standard green salad or sandwich topping:
New Red Potato and Arugula Salad:
(Shamelessly ripped off from here)
1. Season water in a large pot and bring it to a boil.
2. While waiting for that to happen, wash and chop 1-2lbs new red potatoes. You want bite sized pieces, slightly smaller than if you were making straight up boiled potatoes.
3. Boil the potatoes for about 15 minutes.
4. Drain those in your colander and let cool.
5. While that is cooling, get some arugula. You want enough volume of arugula to match the amount of potatoes you've cooked. Wash your arugula, dry it, and tear it up. You want big pieces, and you probably don't want to eat the stems. You can eat the stems, but it doesn't look as nice and people have stems hanging out of their mouths, and everybody looks like a hillbilly.
6. Now, in a separate bowl, mix 3 tablespoons of white vinegar with salt, pepper and few cloves worth of minced garlic.
7. Slowly pour 1/4 cup of olive oil into the vinegar mixture while whisking the crap out of it. You want to beat it till it is glossy. You know to do that thing to it. . . When it all homogenizes. . . . My wife knows what I'm talking about. . .
8. Toss the cool potatoes with the dry and torn arugula and the newly made dressing in a big bowl.
9. Serve at room temp.
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Ratatouille
Ratatouille is a word I am incapable of spelling correctly on the first try. It is also impossible for me not to say these lines when thinking about it.
Then, I end up singing this all day.
Then, I want to make some meat loaf.
It's rough.
Anyways, here's a recipe for you if you have a lot of veggies and a decent amount of time.
1. Start with some veggies.
2. Jesus look at 'em all.
3. Peel the eggplant and cube it. You want it about the size your knuckle to the tip of your finger. Don't cut your finger.
4. Put the eggplant in a colander and toss it with some salt, I don't care how much you use. Place the colander on top of a bowl.
Then, I end up singing this all day.
Then, I want to make some meat loaf.
It's rough.
Anyways, here's a recipe for you if you have a lot of veggies and a decent amount of time.
1. Start with some veggies.
3. Peel the eggplant and cube it. You want it about the size your knuckle to the tip of your finger. Don't cut your finger.
4. Put the eggplant in a colander and toss it with some salt, I don't care how much you use. Place the colander on top of a bowl.
5. Now you are going to want to dice a yellow onion.
You'll want to cut it in halves and leave the hairy end on. That way you can cut a grid onto it and get a nice even dice just by making slices. Like so:
Then just throw those into a bowl.
God, you know what a bowl looks like. Why did I take a picture of that? The danged thing is sideways even.
5. Chop two bell peppers and put them in their own bowl.
Again with the bowl? You people know what a bowl full of peppers looks like, right? Jeez oh peas.
6. Now chop up zucchini and/or squash and put that in a, you guessed it, bowl.
You want at least two zucchini or one zucchini and one squash.
7. Now you want to chop up two tomatoes. Remove the skin from them, if you'd like. It's not really necessary. Guess where you put the tomatoes?
Another bowl. You guys got lots of bowls, right?
8. Now mince a few cloves of garlic and put that in a much smaller bowl.
9. Now, put a little bit of olive oil in a dutch oven or a large pot and heat it up.
10. Saute the onion in the dutch oven with a pinch of salt until they turn from this-
to this-
It takes about 10 minutes on medium.You want the onions to be a little browned.
11. Now toss the bell peppers in with the onions and saute those together for about 5 minutes, just enough time to soften up the peppers.
12. Empty the dutch oven and put the pepper/onion mixture in a large bowl. You have some clean bowls left, right?
13. Add a teaspoon of olive oil into your dutch oven and saute your zucchini and/or squash (with another pinch of salt) for about five minutes.
14. Put that into the pepper and onion bowl. No new bowl! Huzzah!
15. Now remember how you had that eggplant colander in a bowl? Here's why.
All this stuff has come out of the eggplant. Scientists have no idea what it is, but I'm pretty sure you don't want to touch it.
16. Keeping the eggplant in the colander, rinse it off in the kitchen sink.
17. Gently massage the eggplant to wring out any extra water. The eggplant will be glad you did.
18. Toss another teaspoon or two of olive oil into the dutch oven, and saute the eggplant over medium heat for about ten minutes. When it starts to look a little translucent, it's done. Put those in a bowl. You don't need a new bowl once again! Put it in with the onions and peppers and squash.
19. At this point your pot/dutch oven is probably looking like this:
That's okay. You want that. (As long as it is brown and not black and smoking/burning/catching fire.) In the business, we call that glaze.
This is a good time to clean out the glaze a little bit. Put a quarter cup of water in your dutch oven, and scrape the bottom a bit with your spoon or spatula or pancake flipper. (You can use wine, but you know.)
20. After you've loosened up your glaze, pour it over your big bowl of veggies. I hope you didn't use soap to clean it. If you did, don't pour it over the vegetables. The ones in the bowl. You know, the squash and the peppers and the onions.
21. Where the hell was I? Bowls! Right.
22. Put another teaspoon of olive oil in the dutch oven and saute the garlic in it for about a minute. It'll turn yellow and smell really nice.
23. Dump the tomatoes, some black pepper, a bay leaf and a few sprigs of thyme on top of the garlic. Saute those until the tomatoes breakdown a little bit and their juices start bubbling. Going from this:
-to-
24. All right, now dump that bowl of peppers and onions and squash back in the pot with the tomatoes.
25. Toss them around a bit until the peppers and the tomatoes and the squash and the eggplant and all those guys are good friends.
26. Bring it to a good bubble, then reduce to a simmer.
27. Let it simmer for about an hour, give or take half an hour. The veggies are going to break down more the longer you leave them in there, and the flavors are going to mingle a little more. In either case, you'll want to stir the pot and scrape the bottom to prevent too much glaze from building up in the bottom of the pot.
It looks like this after a half an hour.
It looks like this after about 70 minutes:
28. Jesus, it looks like barf.
29. Smells really good though.
30. Cut up some basil leaves into ribbons. You want, essentially, a wide chiffonade.
31. Take it off the heat, put the basil ribbons in and take the bay leaf and thyme out.
32. Serve it in a, you guessed it, BOWL!
33. Use a basil leaf to distract from the fact that it looks like vegetable stew. . . .
Saturday, July 19, 2014
The winning Vegetable of Week 1
Of all the veggies we got week one, the winner was Kohlrabi. I liked the squash and the zucchini and other stuff, but I already knew what I was getting with those. Kohlrabi was a pleasant surprise. Even my daughter liked it, and she won't eat anything.
Okay, no pictures here because I already used all my kohlrabi. But I want to publicly endorse this weirdo vegetable.
It tastes like broccoli or Brussels sprouts, and kind of looks like a mutant turnip.
To prepare them, you'll want to cut off the leaves, and then peel the green coat on the outside. It's a little thicker than a potato jacket or tomato skin, so you might want to bust out a paring knife.
I prepared the Kohlrabi two ways:
1. "Fries"
a. Heat a few tablespoons of oil in a skillet.
b. While that gets hot, cut peeled kohlrabi into sticks, roughly the size of steak fries.
c. Toss your kohlrabi sticks into some seasoned flour. (A little salt, pepper, and garlic powder works fine.)
d. Cook the kohlrabi is small batches on the skillet. You'll want to do about five minutes on one side, then flip them over and cook another five minutes. The kohlrabi should brown some.
It's okay to eat raw, so cook it as little or as much as you want.
2. Roasted
a. Put a 13 by 9 casserole dish into the oven.
b. Turn the oven on to 450. Let's let that dish get hot.
c. Cut the peeled kohlrabi into cubes of half to three quarters of an inch.
d. Toss the kohlrabi in a bowl with some olive oil, salt, pepper and thyme.
e. When that is coated, dump it into the hot dish. Don't touch that dish, it's hot.
f. Let the kohlrabi cook in the oven for 15 minutes.
g. While it's cooking, take a squash and quarter it lengthwise. (The original version I read used a butternut squash, but my hippie box had a big summer squash.)
h. Use your knife or a grapefruit spoon to get the seeds out.
i. Cut the squash into pieces about the same size as your kohlrabi pieces.
j. Toss the squash in some olive oil, salt, pepper and thyme.
k. Is that your timer? Flip the kohlrabi a bit, then shove it to one side of the casserole dish.
l. Now dump the squash into the non kohlrabi side of the dish.
m. Now close up the oven and cook all your veggies. You didn't touch the casserole dish, did you? Aw for cripes sake.
n. After fifteen minutes, flip the squash.
o. Cook fifteen more minutes.
p. Pull the dish out of the oven and toss all the veggies together. The era of segregation is over.
q. Serve it in a nice and pretty new dish, or else warn people not to touch that casserole dish. Oh man, is that dish going to be hot.
Okay, no pictures here because I already used all my kohlrabi. But I want to publicly endorse this weirdo vegetable.
It tastes like broccoli or Brussels sprouts, and kind of looks like a mutant turnip.
To prepare them, you'll want to cut off the leaves, and then peel the green coat on the outside. It's a little thicker than a potato jacket or tomato skin, so you might want to bust out a paring knife.
I prepared the Kohlrabi two ways:
1. "Fries"
a. Heat a few tablespoons of oil in a skillet.
b. While that gets hot, cut peeled kohlrabi into sticks, roughly the size of steak fries.
c. Toss your kohlrabi sticks into some seasoned flour. (A little salt, pepper, and garlic powder works fine.)
d. Cook the kohlrabi is small batches on the skillet. You'll want to do about five minutes on one side, then flip them over and cook another five minutes. The kohlrabi should brown some.
It's okay to eat raw, so cook it as little or as much as you want.
2. Roasted
a. Put a 13 by 9 casserole dish into the oven.
b. Turn the oven on to 450. Let's let that dish get hot.
c. Cut the peeled kohlrabi into cubes of half to three quarters of an inch.
d. Toss the kohlrabi in a bowl with some olive oil, salt, pepper and thyme.
e. When that is coated, dump it into the hot dish. Don't touch that dish, it's hot.
f. Let the kohlrabi cook in the oven for 15 minutes.
g. While it's cooking, take a squash and quarter it lengthwise. (The original version I read used a butternut squash, but my hippie box had a big summer squash.)
h. Use your knife or a grapefruit spoon to get the seeds out.
i. Cut the squash into pieces about the same size as your kohlrabi pieces.
j. Toss the squash in some olive oil, salt, pepper and thyme.
k. Is that your timer? Flip the kohlrabi a bit, then shove it to one side of the casserole dish.
l. Now dump the squash into the non kohlrabi side of the dish.
m. Now close up the oven and cook all your veggies. You didn't touch the casserole dish, did you? Aw for cripes sake.
n. After fifteen minutes, flip the squash.
o. Cook fifteen more minutes.
p. Pull the dish out of the oven and toss all the veggies together. The era of segregation is over.
q. Serve it in a nice and pretty new dish, or else warn people not to touch that casserole dish. Oh man, is that dish going to be hot.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
Zucchini Muffins!
How could you not like a muffin?
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Make sure the oven is empty first. If you had a cat in the oven, magical things could happen.
2. Get some zucchini!
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Make sure the oven is empty first. If you had a cat in the oven, magical things could happen.
2. Get some zucchini!
3. Grate those two zucchini. You don't have to peel them or seed them or anything like that. Just cut off the ends.
4. In a bowl combine two eggs, 4/3 cup of sugar and a half tablespoon of vanilla.
5. Now add the zucchini to the eggs and sugar.
6. It looks like spinach dip, but don't eat it.
7. Now for a trick that makes everything better: a stick and a half of melted butter!
8. It's pretty tempting to drink that butter, but go ahead and pour it into the zucchini mixture.
9. Now get a new damned bowl.
10. Into this bowl add three cups of flour, two teaspoons of baking soda, a half teaspoon of salt, just under a tablespoon of cinnamon, and a 1/2 teaspoon of nutmeg.
11. Oh, you should probably mix it.
12. Then mix the dry into the wet. It'll turn out pretty thick.
13. Grease the crap out of a muffin tin. Those papers are for the weak.
14. This mixture will not pour. You'll need to spoon it into the tins. Go all the way to the very top.
15. Pop it into the oven.
16. Close the oven door. Otherwise the kitchen gets very hot.
17. The oven should be done in roughly thirty minutes.
18. Transfer from the rack to a rack.
19. I didn't make a boob joke!
20. Now eat the muffins. Eat all the goddamned muffins!
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Kennedy Vs. Vegetables
So, my wife signed up for some sort of hippie vegetable share. This means, essentially, that we get a Chopped style box with a less dramatic time limit (i.e. the rate at which these vegetables are perishable).
As you can see, those are vegetables. Including a leak, some cucumbers, squashes, some romaine, garlic scapes, kohlrabi, chard, carrots, a cabbage, and sage.
I've used a bunch of stuff so far, and will share some recipes in the future using the Kennedy Vs. Vegetables tag. (Label, I mean label. Blogger has labels.)
As you can see, those are vegetables. Including a leak, some cucumbers, squashes, some romaine, garlic scapes, kohlrabi, chard, carrots, a cabbage, and sage.
I've used a bunch of stuff so far, and will share some recipes in the future using the Kennedy Vs. Vegetables tag. (Label, I mean label. Blogger has labels.)
Thursday, June 26, 2014
Parmesan Pizza Dough
Sure, we all love pizza.
But who can afford those ridiculous frozen pizza prices? $5.99? All right, Mr. Rockefeller!
Anyway, making pizza dough is easy enough. The tricky part is starting about 2 hours before you want to eat it.
1. Let the tap water run on hot for a bit to get some warm water. It takes my faucet a little while to get warm. You'r gonna want a cup of warm water. Around 110 degrees or so. You don't want it boiling or anything like that, just warm enough to activate the yeast.
2. I a large bowl, mix one of those little envelopes of yeast with your warm water, a tablespoon of olive oil and a teaspoon of honey.
3. Let is sit for a couple of minutes until it looks foamy and slightly blurry (like you are a mostly incompetent photographer).
4. Add 1 1/2 cups of flour and up to a teaspoon of salt. Mix until smooth.
5. And another 1/2 cup of flour and mix until smooth.
6. Add 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese and mix until smooth.
7. Add another 1/2 cup of flour and mix till smooth.
8. Knead the dough on a floured surface for about 3 minutes to 5 minutes.
9. Oil a large bowl. Use about a tablespoon of olive oil.
10. Put the dough into the bowl, turning it around so that the oil is all around the dough.
11. Wait for it. . .
12. Wait for it. . .
13. Wait for it. . .
14. Wait for it. . .
15. Wait for it. . .
16. Now you've got some pizza dough. This takes about 75 minutes.
Now, this is enough dough to make one really big pizza or two decent sized pizzas.
Here's what I did last time:
a. I put my pizza stone in the oven (bottom shelf) and then turned the oven on full blast about an hour before cooking time.
b. I spread the dough out into two rounds by hand: one on a floured cutting board to transfer onto the pizza stone, the other on a pizza sheet that has been greased and sprinkled with corn meal.
c. Sauced them. Cheesed them.
But who can afford those ridiculous frozen pizza prices? $5.99? All right, Mr. Rockefeller!
Anyway, making pizza dough is easy enough. The tricky part is starting about 2 hours before you want to eat it.
1. Let the tap water run on hot for a bit to get some warm water. It takes my faucet a little while to get warm. You'r gonna want a cup of warm water. Around 110 degrees or so. You don't want it boiling or anything like that, just warm enough to activate the yeast.
2. I a large bowl, mix one of those little envelopes of yeast with your warm water, a tablespoon of olive oil and a teaspoon of honey.
3. Let is sit for a couple of minutes until it looks foamy and slightly blurry (like you are a mostly incompetent photographer).
4. Add 1 1/2 cups of flour and up to a teaspoon of salt. Mix until smooth.
5. And another 1/2 cup of flour and mix until smooth.
6. Add 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese and mix until smooth.
7. Add another 1/2 cup of flour and mix till smooth.
8. Knead the dough on a floured surface for about 3 minutes to 5 minutes.
9. Oil a large bowl. Use about a tablespoon of olive oil.
10. Put the dough into the bowl, turning it around so that the oil is all around the dough.
11. Wait for it. . .
16. Now you've got some pizza dough. This takes about 75 minutes.
Now, this is enough dough to make one really big pizza or two decent sized pizzas.
Here's what I did last time:
a. I put my pizza stone in the oven (bottom shelf) and then turned the oven on full blast about an hour before cooking time.
b. I spread the dough out into two rounds by hand: one on a floured cutting board to transfer onto the pizza stone, the other on a pizza sheet that has been greased and sprinkled with corn meal.
c. Sauced them. Cheesed them.
(Make sure they are blurry!)
d. I slid the cutting board pizza onto the pizza stone and put the pan pizza into the shelf above.
e. The pizza stone pizza is done and ready in about 7 minutes, whereas the tray pizza will take a little longer.
f. The stone pizza gets some fresh arugula from the dirt worshiping heathens of my community garden and some prosciutto on top of that to hold it down. The other pizza is for my kid, who doesn't want to eat anything.
Time for a Pizza PARTY!
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