Drink Like Don Draper

The latest season of "Mad Men" might be over, but you can still drink like Don Draper. (I won't of, of course; I was saved.)

The OLD FASHIONED

1. Place a sugar cube into an old-fashioned glass. 

2. Shake on a dash of bitters.

3. Drop a teaspoon of water onto the cube. 

4. Muddle until dissolved. 

5. Add 2oz of Whiskey (or Rye) and stir. 

6. Add a twist of lemon, and some ice cubes. 

7. Say something demeaning to women and/or insult someone you care about. 

If you are against watering down alcohol with ice cubes, I have a set of these. (Never had any of the problems discussed in negative Amazon reviews.)

Mai Tai

I don't drink. I haven't had more than a taste of anything since Clinton was president.

But even I know that the poor Mai Tai is abused and confused in this modern world of tacky chain restaurants, trendy kids with ironic clothing, and MFin' Bacardi.

The following is not THE definitive recipe, but is close enough for the common man. If you are offered a Mai Tai with any juice in it other than lime juice, throw it in the bartender's face.

1. Fill a cocktail shaker with ice.

2.  In that cocktail shaker add 2 oz. light rum, 2 oz. dark rum, 1 oz Curacao, the juice of one fresh lime (Don't use Rose's or the little plastic lime), 1 Tbsp simple syrup, 1 Tbsp orgeat syrup (the almond syrup they use at coffee shops).

3. Shake.

4. Strain into a chilled double old-fashioned glass over a little cracked ice.

6. Garnish with a sprig of mint.

Mad Men Party!

Well, maybe not a full party. . .

So we watched Mad Men last night, and invited over our sad, cable-less parents. Well, my wife's parents, but that's neither here nor there.

Anywho, for our somewhat-impromptu viewing party, the wife and I supplied the following:

Pigs in Blankets
1. Since this is an impromptu party, there is no time to make sausages or croissant dough. So we had to buy a package of "Little Smokies" sausages (Cocktail wieners will do, but these are better.), and one of those tubes of 35% flakier croissant dough.

2. We assembled them ahead of time. To do this: unroll the croissant dough and cut smaller to fit the tiny sausages. Depending on which size you bought, you should be able to get 3-5 portions from each croissant. Wrap the dough around the middle, leaving a little overhang on each side. Place on a seasoned cookie sheet.

3. You can throw them in the fridge like this until guests arrive. When ready, throw them into a 350 degree oven until the croissant dough is golden brown. (About 10 minutes.)

4. Serve with a whole grain mustard.


Martini
1. Pour into a mixing glass over ice 3oz of a good gin and 1/4teaspoon of dry vermouth.

2. Stir.

3. Strain into a chilled martini glass.

4. Throw a cocktail olive in there.

Vodka and shaking are for brutes. (I'm looking at you Mr. Bond.)

Then again, I'm a teetotaler, so this is all theoretical.



Coconut Macaroons
You shouldn't be friends with people who don't like coconut. They are not to be trusted.

1. In a large bowl combine 5 cups Angel Flake sweetened coconut, 2/3 cups sugar,  6 tablespoons flour and  a pinch of salt. (If you don't have sweetened coconut, you can use moist shredded coconut with sweetened condensed milk. A little more than a cup or so should work.) Mix this until uniform.


2. Mix in 4 egg whites and a teaspoon of almond extract. (If you don't have almond, you can use vanilla, but you might want to use up to 2 teaspoons.

3. Mix until uniform.

4. With a melon baller (or a tablespoon if you don't have such fancy things) drop balls of dough onto a greased and floured cookie sheet.

5. Bake at 325 for up to 20 minutes. The edges will become golden when they are perfect.

6. Take them off the sheets right away and cool them on a wire rack.

That's it. It's easy and requires few ingredients. After they are cooled you can roll them in sifted confectioner's sugar or dip them halfway into some melted chocolate. (If you do the chocolate, you have to chill them in order for the chocolate to set.

If you want chocolate throughout, that's a different recipe. You should buy unsweetened coconut, heat the sweetened condensed milk, throw a couple of tablespoons of cocoa in there, and let that cool before mixing it into the coconut.